Anthony, Carmelo Anthony

Carmelo Anthony may have cashed in all of his orange and blue chips when he stayed in New York, but the Carmelo Royale train isn’t looking so hot these days. With the Knicks refusing to win more than 1 or 2 games in a row, the team is looking like a dumpster fire of biblical proportions and consistent sports meme inspiration. As of now, they have fewer wins than the New York Giants. It’s sad to watch. Iman Shumpert and the eraser living on his head love to shoot jumpers, and yet they don’t go in all that often. Something needs to be done about these Knicks immediately. We don’t know what it is, and we wouldn’t know how to execute if we did; but if something isn’t done soon, Melo should stick that pistol in his mouth, and make sure we’re standing directly behind him.

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