Yoenis Cespedes Trade to Mets Sparks Immediate Festivus Jokes

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Believe it or not, the Mets managed to acquire Yoenis Cespedes. He’s a four hitter, his hips don’t lie, and if he has any sort of peanut allergy or a fear of low-flying planes, the Mets have (thankfully) ignored it.

So go ahead, everyone—celebrate. Celebrate a lot, and scream “A Cespedes for the Rest of Us!” before it gets played out and makes people want to throw full souvenir cups of beer at your head (a value of $15). And a big thank you to Jerry Seinfeld himself for realizing, real fast I might add, how quickly this needed to happen..

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