Kolten Wong in Pop Culture

What the fuck is it with the Cardinals every MLB season. Are they just fucking perfect everywhere. Groomed minor league players ready for the October show AND productive free agent signings that actually live up to their expectations?? Where do you get off?

As I’m sure you can tell, St. Louis, I’m speaking ironically and have nothing but great things to say about your wonderful, fan-pleasing franchise. But here’s a thought – take a couple years off and let someone else win a couple games. God knows I’m not referring to the Amazins, but what about the Pittsburgh Pirates or some awesome young team that we can’t help but root for. Could be fun (see Kansas City Royals, circa 2014).

So, pardon me Mr. PERFECT! I guess I forgot that you never ever make a mistake.

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